Worst New Comedy

With a sketch show, an 80's-style "yoof TV" revival and a spin-off from a YouTube clip, clearly we're using a unique definition of the word "new" here.

Beached Az - 42.86%
"Who knew that 'Beached as, bro' was the biggest comedy catchphrase of the moment? Not me, that's for sure. In fact, I still don't."
- 13 schoolyards
"I must have missed the directive that all Australians must find repeated utterings of 'bro' by kiwis, funny."
- elvislemonade
"Just not funny, simple as that, didn't laugh once."
- Ontos
Double Take - 33.33%
Hungry Beast - 23.81%

Last year's winner:
Monster House

The original 90-second YouTube video Beached Az contained one "joke": a whale saying the words "beached az" in a New Zealand accent. Pardon the crudity, but how the fuck does this qualify you to get a series up on the ABC? Seriously, if saying two words in a funny accent is now enough to get you a series, then saying "Get a black dog up ya!" in a bogan voice now qualifies you to take over as host of The 7.30 Report.

And clearly there's been some mistake with Double Take's nomination in this category. Calling a show put together by the producing staff of Comedy Inc and featuring some of Australia's most tired sketch "performers" new (Amanda Bishop! Hellen Dallimore! Guy Edmonds! And who could forget Comedy Inc's own Paul McCarthy, still doing the same Kochie impersonation he did on Comedy Inc) is far, far funnier than anything that actually took place on this stale attempt to cash in on a sketch comedy market that hasn't existed since the twentieth century.

As for Hungry Beast, again, clearly there's been some slip-up. How can any show featuring sketches from Dan Ilic - aka the guy who looked like a creepy uncle back on The Ronnie Johns Half Hour - be considered in any way "new"? And it's not like Marc Fennell's "hilarious" smarmy act wasn't well-worn from his work on Triple J TV either. It's enough to make you think all that talk from Denton about how he wanted to create a programme that would showcase the next generation of television talent was nothing but advertising hype. As if the producer of The Gruen Factor and :30 Seconds would know anything about advertising.

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